I Need To Talk About My Sweet Granddaugher Amberlyn :)

She was born on Wednesday,  October 3, 2014 at Ogden Regional Hospital.  I was there at the hospital the morning she was born.

Andrea called me late on the evening of the 2nd and said she was heading to the Hospital. I told her I would sleep a bit and come over. She labored thru the night and I arrived about 5:30 am. We talked for a very short time, then Andrea said it felt like it was time.  They called the Nurse and the nurse had to catch the Doctor before he left the Hospital. He was leaving I guess he thought she had more time. 

They brought all they needed to deliver the baby into her room in a roller cart. That is a nice way to create peace for the babies coming. The doctor came to her.

Andrea and Seth wanted to have their first moments with Amberlyn  so I stood right out side the door texting everyone that the time was NOW. It was very exciting they left the door open with only a curtain between so I could hear everything. The doctor said "Just a little push" and the next thing i heard was Amberlyn's cry. I jumped up and down. 

 Today...Six Months Later: She is a sweet little girl.  Very connected to Momma right now. She Cries for her momma if someone tries to take her. She is very serious and knows what she wants :). It is one of the biggest joys of my life to see my lovely Andrea become a wonderful, strong Mother to her children. I feel very blessed to have her as my daughter. I pray every night for Gods continued protection on her sweet little Family. <3

Grandma Loves you Amberlyn :)

Bullet your whole day

*8:30 AM Woke felling sore....Really dislike Medicines

*9:30 AM Stopped for coffee At Hwy 89 Grounds for Coffee....Love that place they aways remember my order :)

*10:00 Stopped by New Image DaySpa....Stayed only a few minutes

*10:05 Stopped by FedEx and got copies of my Christmas Letter to put in cards :)

*10:30 Got to Megaplex to see Hunger Games MockingJay W/ my friend Terry and her Mom. Good Movie I cried all the way thru

*12:30 Took Terrys Mom Joni to Lunch at Kentucky Fried Chicken....We had 2 piece meals

*1:30 Dropped Joni off at her house.

*2:30 Took Ryan Lunch from Zupas. Mushroom Soup and a  Chicken  Avocado Pita...He's not feeling good today

*3:30 Went and Visited Sis and Taiyden and Amberlyn We all went to Gordmans And picked out Christmas presents for Seth from the Kids...Taiyden smelled all the candles with Grandma...he was so cute He Kept saying that on and that one and smells good it was precious! Hes so curious.

*5:30 Got Panda Express for the kids and me

*6-11 Dinner/Crochet on a blanket for Taiyden/TV/Worked on finishing Christmas Cards.

*11:30 Got Ry Hot water for Feet and a cool towel for his head....he is sick and a couple of days without Cigarettes He has a massive headache.

*12:00 I guess the day is technically over so here I sit Recording it all.

GREAT DAY I GOT TO SEE ALL MY FAVORITE PEOPLE!

Love Sign

Day 6: Zodiac Sign....July 23, 1957

 This one has always been a hard question for me...My Birthday falls on a cusp between two signs. Between the 2 most "different" signs of  the Zodiac;
 Cancer which is the mildest and quietest Sign (the Crab)
And
 Leo which is the proudest and loudest Sign (the Lion)

  I'd say that about sums me up. 1/2 the time I feel strong and able to take on anything, out going and vivacious.... 
AND then the other half of my time Iam Kind and Giving and wanting to be Home cuddled in a warm safe blanket away from the world.

So am I Like my Zodiac Sign says I am?  I don't know .... I will let you decide...
Okay well Maybe from that statement iam a little more Cancer lol.

Oh and yes I do believe in the signs I have seen them been right more times than not.

 Plus I believe Names have an impact on ones life as well.    Andrea "womanly femininely"  Ryan "little King"  Don "King"  and Deb means "Bee" flitting from one thing to another....that has always been ME :)   So do I Believe there are deeper forces working behind the scene..... You Bet Ya!

Day 5-My favorite comfort food and why?

It would have to be Fried Chicken and mash potatoes.....green beans...biscuits and gravy...Cole slaw freshly made.  Dessert Lemon Meringue Pie YUM!  Why-My Grandmas Christmas Menu all during my childhood! Thanks grandma!

Day 4- My Views on Religion...
I believe in GOD, His son Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. I believe you do not have to visit them in Church. They are always with you. I believe in Joseph Smiths story and I believe the Mormon church is a great place to raise your children. But, I do believe single older ppl  get lost in the church. But none of that is as important as ones personal relationship with God :) Love him, trust him and most of all Believe in HIM! Amen!

Day 3- Top 5 Pet Peeves: 

1. Trying to figure out something/anything on the computer. Thank God for My daughter Andrea. I would be lost :)

2. Feeling like something is missing in Life... When my life is full and busy?

3. PPL  Pushing in in lines,  whether driving or getting coffee...

4. Cruelty of any kind!

5. Being sick and not being able to find the right meds or actions to help.

Day 2: Where will I be in 10 years? Wow I will be 67!  Almost 70??? That's seems impossible. With my health the way it has been Im truthfully not sure I will be here on Earth in the physical form. Each day brings up a different issue for me. Iam struggling.

Today was an exceptionally hard day. I wanted to spend the day with my friend Terry we planned breakfast, a trip to Costco, and to wait for her sons girlfriend 30 mins then off to Micheals and make Christmas wreaths. Sounds like a fun day to me.....but I found myself CRASHING at 12:30... I felt sick and tired and a little confused.... so I left before her sons girlfriend got there Never got to make that Christmas wreath and I did want to , I came home and slept Now awake...I still feel groggy and pucky.  10 years from now is not in my thoughts ...getting to Christmas is. Just getting to every day feels like a goal.

   On the days I feel good I would like to think I would travel to Ireland, take a Viking River Cruise and enjoy watching my grandbabies grow and having a relationship with them. Watching my Son and Daughter grow and mature, Helping in some way, to make the world better.  Seeing my family in Ohio again. Giving my dad a kiss on the cheek, Laughing with my sister Jill. Hearing one of my brother Johns dry jokes that always make  me laugh. Playing games with Dave and Barb. Talking about everything and nothing :)  Being Loved by someone I can respect and Love back would be icing on the cake of those 10 years. And Write the Great American Novel that would be about it. What I would like to accomplish in the next 10 years....Good Lord A Willing And The Creek Don't Rise....:) From these Pages to Gods ears...DR

Day 1: Relationships

Ok Im never sure how to Post these things but im doing Andreas 30 Day Blog Challenge :)
1) Whats your relationship like? 

Well I have a warm relationship with God right now. I trust him and believe in him. I believe he has my best interest at heart. He has blessed me with 2 wonderful children, 1 great Son in law and 2 beautiful grand children Whom I believe HUNG THE MOON :).  I am content.

 I was married for 19 years and I wouldn't change those years for any thing. They were full. But, they ended and a new chapter in my life began. I am a single 50 something divorcee whoohoo :).  Not really as exciting as it sounds :). But, I wouldn't trade my Freedom that I have right now. I am Free to be Me without being Judged or asked to change my self in any way. I don't feel like I have to impress any one or think a certain way just because someone else tells me too. My thoughts, my mind what goes in and comes out are all mine. I like that. Would I like to have a relationship in the future Yes. But he would have to be a pretty understanding man. Because there is not much I would like to change.....a bigger house/and travel  a bit and that's all :).  Thanks for listening/reading. Peace and Love! DR

THE LIEBSTER AWARD

                                                     

 

The Liebster Award is given by bloggers to up and coming bloggers as a way to spread the word about smaller blogs who deserve a bigger audience. This award is an honor, but once nominated you must earn it:

• You must list 11 things about yourself
• Answer 11 questions put to you by the person who nominated you
• Choose up to 3 bloggers with less than 200 followers to nominate and post 11 questions for them to answer
• Visit your nominee's pages to inform them of their award

                                                                        These are your ....
11 things about yourself:

1. Why do you blog?
2. If you had a million (tax free) dollars to spend what would you use it for?
3. If you were to go on any reality TV show which would it be? and why?
4. If you could have dinner with any one person alive or dead who would it be? and why?
5. If you could go back to any time in your life what would that time be? and Why?
6. If you had a super power what would it be? and what would you use it for?
7. What is your favorite piece of clothing?
8. Where is your favorite vacation spot?
9. What is your favorite sport or exercise?
10. If you could tell your 15 year old self one thing what would it be?
11. What is your favorite band/artist?

1) I am a massage therapist and I really appreciate being able to  making ppl feel better.  Best Job Ive ever  had :)
2) I have 2 great children and wonderful Son-in-law and a BEAUTIFUL new Grand baby boy   LOVE THEM ALL.
3) I work at New Image Day spa Voted Best Spa in Utah by the Standard Examiners "Best of the top of Utah" Contest  thank you very much
4) I rent a house In Ogden UT
5) Iam originally from Westerville, Ohio and I have 2 great brothers/sister-in-laws, dad and the best nieces and nef from there.
6) I lived in Boulder Colorado and surrounding areas for 7 years or so.
7) I am addicted to the show Big Brother. I Have to watch every season and get the on line feed...its a terrible addiction I need a 12 steps really.
8) I secretly know that the Publishers Clearing House Van is going to come knocking on my door SOON!
9) I want to someday take a Viking River Cruise to anywhere they go and I will once the Publishers Clearing house delivers my money.
10) I have not had a date in 9 years or so and yes I mean "DATE" :(
11) I thank God every day for the family and friends and life that I get to enjoy.... I look forward to tomorrow.

My Questions:

1. Why do you blog?I blog so that the ppl I love in this world will know how much they mean to me.
2. If you had a million (tax free) dollars to spend what would you use it for? Buy my kids each a house and myself a house. So everything else would be gravy :)

     3. If you were to go on any reality TV show which would it be? and why?
                           Big Brother       To win  $500,000

     4. If you could have dinner with anyone person alive or dead who would it be and why?
         I would love to have dinner with my mom and grandma and everyone,  one last time. We
         would sit in my Grandmas kitchen and watch her cook up her Green beans w/bacon, homemade
         biscuits, and the Worlds Best "Fried Chicken", w/her mashed potatoes and gravy and cole slaw
         and the best Lemon Meringue Pie I have ever tasted!  Why? Because I would love 
         to have my grandson Taiyden and my mom together in the same room. That would be choice.

     5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would you live?
         Thats a life long question for me.  I would love to live somewhere warm to med
          temperature. Beautiful mountains, with bodies of water close by.  But, the most important
          thing about the place were I live would be my family with in walking distance of me. All of
          us together.

     6. If you had a Super Power what would it be? and what would you use it for?
         Super Hearing ... to know what everyone wants when they are around me :)

     7. What is your favorite movie?
              Gone With The Wind      any romantic comedy

     8. Where is you favorite Vacation Spot?
          It was probably Upper Michigan Bob and Maxines Cabin/Trailer.  Or the all inclusive trip to
          Cancun w/Andrea and Ryan  or My trip to Europe Paris/Moscow/Madrid.

     9. What is your favorite book?
          Usually the last one I read :)

    10. If you could tell your 15 year old self one thing What would it be?
          Enjoy every day.  Go to Massage School not Cosmetology. Believe in yourself.  Learn to sing
          and dance and be happy with how you do both.  Stay away from sugar and exercise every day.
          Don't be afraid to show your love and let your light shine always.

    11. What is your favorite Band/Artist?  Lady Antebellum and Katy Perry (Shut up... she sings
           happy songs :)

My nominees are:

As Random As Random Gets - Love his Posts pretty funny and a little Insightful as well. He
 needs to write more. I look forward to them.

How Many Frogs - This is a funny Blog but not sure if it is still being added to its about a girls search for a guy and all the Frogs She doesnt kiss :).  But I believe she has found her one and only!

Cakes by Sherree - Shes amazing and very artistic




        


  
         

      


     

The horror in theather 9

This world has so much horror in it sometimes.

 We go along thinking all is well and life is good and then BAM the outside world comes slamming into our nightly news and welds itself onto our brain with excrusiating pain.  The thought of sitting in a dark movie theater and waiting as I have done hundreds of times in my life for some enriching fun escaptism to take me away is now a reason for mini-panic-attacks.   Ive been to 2 movies since the tragedy in Theater 9 in Aurora Colorado on July 20, 2012.  Spiderman and "The Dark Knight" The Batman movie that was playing that fateful night.  It was all I could do to stay seated while the credits began at the beginning of the show... Truefully all I could think about is what part of the movie did he throw that cannester of tear gas and what row was the first poor victim sitting in when he raised his rifle and pulled the trigger?  Was it loud and action packed or the slow part where Batman dances with Catwoman?   I shrank alittle in my seat and held my purse on my lap because I knew I could stop a bullet with my big heavy filled with junk purse.... pfffff.   What crap... If it had happended in this theater would I fall over my friend to save her life or would I step over everyone in an effort to save my own?  Would the 3 boys that sat beside us be heros or like the guy who ran all the way home and left his family in theater 9???

I do think of those 3 men in Theater 9 that gave up their lives for their girlfriends.  What amazing bravery.  That is what real men are made of.  What greatness is.  I hope that when they got to the hallowed presense of Father in Heaven that he hugged them all with open arms and praised them for their selfless acts of courage. 

I dont know what drove this crazed killer to do what he did, but he has taken yet another piece of innocence away from all of us.  Dragged humanity down to a dark place that we fight so hard to pretend does not exist.  Was he a bad person, was he possessed by satan, or did he just feel so alone that nothing mattered, no one mattered.  Loneliness, a sense of being disconnected from others is a very dark place indeed.  We need to reach out more to one another. To care about each other more.  I know Iam bad at gathering those I know who need more love and encouragement up and giving it to them.  But I do pray for more insight, for more love in my heart to help those I know need it.  Including maybe even my self.....

God Bless us all, Save Us All.  And give us all the courage those 3 young men had in that Theater on that dark July night.

Im a Grandma....Wow

Well its been a great month.  From Being at the Hospital for the birth of my first sweet grandson (Taiyden Seth Gabbitas born 6/5/2012). To watching my daughter as she bonds and cherishes her little guy. I Thank God Everyday for the gift he has given me to be a Grandma.  Its weird because when I was little my Grandma was so old and now here Iam and Im So Young .... lol    Life is all about perspective :)

Yes Virginia there is a FUTURE! :-)

Ones perspective and life csn change, even if you think it never will. You go along for years and things seem like they will never be different, then low and behold. They Are! Iam so excited for the next adventures in our lives. A new addition. My daughter sweet baby boy.

Well for all my last post being about my demise I guess I am going to live a bit longer lol. I am working like crazy now Product Manager and Massage Therapist. 2 full time jobs. And I cant wait to see my beautiful daughter have her first baby! A Boy Taiyden...its only 4 weeks away Iam so thrilled. Andrea looks so sweet with her little belly and she will be such a wonderful mom I CANT WAIT! Peace and LOvE always :-)

Life is Funny!

Life is funny... true...But it is also sad. I go to sleep some nights and I can feel my heart pounding so loudly I know it is struggling to keep working. I feel like Iam sick but because I dont have health insurance and no money I wont really be able to do anything about it. My life will end in the blink of an eye and it may be sooner than later. My biggest regrets will be:

1) That I couldnt give my children the sense of security that they deserved they deserved school money, freedom from addictions, a strong role model, better/smarter genes. (I hope they do know that I am very proud of them though and that I did and do love them with every fiber of my being...I just didnt know how to be the great mom who guided them to great things and for that Iam forever sorry)

2) Im so very sorry that I will not be able to hold my grandbabys in this life. I hope that if there is a God that I will be able to watch over them and my Andrea and Ryan until their time on this earth is thru.

3) I regret that I didnt marry the right man. That I didnt work harder to have my marriage be a a good one, a life long one. It would have been nice to have a man I could have made proud and happy ... and he done the same for me.

4) I have no regrets about the work I did once I found the work I was meant to do. I loved massage and making others feel better was a great joy to me. I guess if I have a regret about massage it would be that my kids didnt like massage and never really wanted one from me :-(. That I do regret.

5) That I wasnt a millionaire and could have my family all around me all my life and that I didnt have more children to enjoy...It would have been nice to have 10 kids and a big huge House and Lots of money to make them all happy. For as my end nears I realize that family is all there really is in this life. Everything else is just gravy as they say. :-)

6) I regret I didnt keep better care of my vessel. I should have exercised everyday and stayed away from sugar. But I loved foods and drinks...starbucks mochas were like opening a little Christmas present every time and pei weis Mangolian Beef well you know i loved it :-). So I enjoyed every day with these little vises that have Im afraid done me in.

If I could impart any words of wisdom it would be "Dont be afraid to do anything". Do everything that comes to your mind. Believe in your self worth that you are a special person and deserve to be respected no matter if you are rich or poor. That is the sadest thing I found about this world that money rules. That good decent people are thrown away daily because they don't have the money to be lifted up to a healthy life.

I have cherished each and every moment I have spent with you Andrea and Ryan. They have been the best moments of my life. I wish they could have been richer and deeper but I hope you know that that is what I wanted more than anything in my life. For you to feel my love.

I had many great moment too! Moments some ppl never have I realize ...I got to go to Europe I have some beautiful snapshots in my mind about my trip and Iam so grateful that I got to go. Standing up by the Flatirons and looking out over Boulder. Mackinaw Is Michigan and upper Michigan and the cabin/trailer. My moms last days that I got to be there with her. Looking out from my grandmas porch and listening to the bells chime in the church a few blocks away. Sitting with my dad on our front porch while a wild storm passed over and hearing him say "Isnt it magnificent" My breath was taken away by many beautiful things. So really my regrets are few. My life has been full. I love my family Andrea and Ry, Mom, Dad, John, Jill, Dave, Barb, Holly, Jake, Britt, Aunt Phyl, and all my family in Minnesota who I really loved visiting with. I have been blessed to have you all in my life. Thanks for being there.

Life is funny and Iam glad I got to laugh thru it! :) Be Happy! Enjoy Every Moment! Love you all, Deb

9/11/11 Ten Years Later!

As the time for 9/11 draws near Im asked by every newspaper and general interest poll...Where were you the day those plans hit the twin towers?

Well I have snippits of that day in my head. I arrived at my work .... South Davis Community Hospital I was a receptionist there while attending Utah College of Massage Therapy. I thought the World was about to be at war when I heard the report of that first plan hitting Tower #1.. I grabbed the phone on the reception desk and called both my children who where in school at that time...I asked the girl who answered the phone to get them out of class, so I could tell them I loved them one last time!!

After talking to them I stayed at work? I cant believe I did that considering the end of the world was at hand....What if it really had been the end? Would I have really manned my post till the big bang blew me out of that swivel chair I was attached too???? We'll never know that for sure...

All day long everyone was frantic and near panic...The phones rang constantly with ppl trying to get ahold of their loved ones in the hospital. The one thing I do remember is everyone stayed at work. I look back on that now and all I can say is America is a strong country for many reasons one of them being our WorkForce. And, on that day most everyone trusted in the strength of our Government to protect us and stop the attacks.

I went home that evening and spent time with my kids and their friends. We pretty much stayed close to new flashes on the tv. Watching the towers fall again and again. One of my kids friends just happen to have his Birthday on that fateful day. I remember driving him home that night and while he was sad for all the ppl that were lost, the bulk of his conversation that night was about how mad he was that his Birthday would now forever be defined by this tragedy.

So I guess what I do remember most about that terrible day... is that I realized how differently each person see's and is affected by any given event. For me I thought I'd never see my kids again... for him his special day marred from that day forward.... For the families who called to talk to their loved ones thats all that mattered. And to the Families that lost loved ones in the Towers it must have felt like the REAL end of the World.

End of the world begins??? What????

So predictions state that on May 21st at 4:00 pm Utah time the earth will begin to rebel against its squatters... ManKind...

I know its all a bunch of hooey ... but one never knows so here are some parting thoughts... This life has been hard and yet easy. I wish Money didnt run the world I think it would have been a better place if money didnt come between me and the ppl I loved and me and my self worth. Although I do acknowledge and I do know that I have been one of the very lucky ones on this planet. I lived in a clean pristine place where for the most part ppl cared about each other and gave of them selves to make the world a better place.

I was moved by Gods Grace on many occasions. When I was young and I was moved by the spirit of God for the first time in a small chapel somewhere in Minnesota. When I graduated from High School with 1000 other ppl all dressed in red and white. When I went to a lone trailer in the woods with a kind hearted person who would one day shape my family. When I looked in the the eyes of my 2 beautiful children for the first time. When I walked across the stage to get my certificate of completion from Utah College of Massage Therapy and my husband and kids were there for me. When I sat and tried to feed my mother some cake from her 80th birthday, which would prove to be her last and when I saw a cross in the sky over my head that followed me for miles the day she died. When I laughed so hard I peed my self just a little at one of my extraordinary moments with my son. Watching my little girl become a woman on her perfect wedding day. These are moments I cherish and Iam so blessed to have had the life that I have had.

Well whether the world ends tomorrow or a million years from tomorrow. Iam glad I was here. Iam glad I had the love I had for my family and my friends. God Bless us all what ever comes. I love you!

My 2 line movie review.

Thor was HOT.... Movie was not! But i could not take my eyes off off the blue eyed wonder. He was perfect for the part.

What a few couple of days!

From the joy of a beautiful Royal Wedding to the elation of a mans demise. This weekend was history in the making.

I got up early Friday morning to watch the union of Kate Middleton and Prince William in holy matrimony. I hadn't really intended to get up as I had the Tivo set for the whole affair but, for some reason, when 4 am rolled around I was wide awake, so I took it as a sign I was to get up and watch this Historic Event. Just as I had done so many years ago at Lady Di's and Prince Charles nuptials. The two weddings couldn't have been more similar and yet very different.

Lady Di's wedding was a FANTASY. I'm not sure if it was because I saw it thru the eyes of a young married woman full of hopeful anticipation of what life would bring to us all. There was so much promise in that day. The horse drawn carriages, the armies of men on horseback and the unbelievable train on her wedding dress! I imagined our kids growing up at about the same time and watching her family and her as they faced the challenges of the world they lived in. The promise that all newlyweds see in their future, eternal family, never ending love and happy security forever. But, time and reality seems to have a way for kicking all those theories like the can on the street ... down into the gutter. Life didn't end well for the fairy princess... and the prince while finding a new princess found companionship but who knows if his life was any better, any happier or was it just a whole new set of obstacles that had to be over come? But on that Day so many years ago. There was a hopefullness about the future.

And just as on Lady Di's day ... Kate M's day was fanciful, yes. But, some how so much more real. She invited her local butcher for goodness sake, and the bar owner in her small town. Can't get much more real than that. So while all the same pomp and circumstance was there on their day Friday April 29, 2011 as it was on Dianna and Charles day way back on July 29, 1981. There was a definite sense that their marriage was based on mutual love and not just duty. That they headed into their life together with a determination if you will to have a lasting and sincere existence. The one thing I would personally like to mention here is her dress. It was perfect, understated and elegant. It was a regal choice. She was a beautiful bride. I do hope for the best, that they will stay together always.


So then there came Sunday May 1, 2011... The man who master minded the killing of thousands at the World Trade Center, the Pentegan and in Pennsylvania on 9-11-2001 was killed and millions cheered. It was a necessary step that had to be followed and many have the right to be happy. But a person died and we as humans must all have to pause and say there but by the grace of God go I, for Evil and Good live in all of us. And we do not know why some of us are blessed with the light while others are engulfed by darkness.... May God have mercy on us all.

I'll take that Challenge...Lets see if I have 15 confessions...?

1. I dye my hair...bet you didnt know that...lmao!
2. Iam addicted to Starbucks Mochas yummm
3. Even as a kid...going to the movies was always my favorite thing to do. I always wanted to be a projectionist...And not even knowing that, my daughter became one!? Life is strange like that.
4. I had a passed life regression that changed my way of thinking.
5. Ive fallen head over heals with only 2 ppl...love at first sight...but neither person was meant for me? That is why I dont understand love???? But, I still hold out hope :-)
6. I really can't get enough of Master Piece Theater... the ones set in the 1700/1800's.
7. I'd like to be thin... But I like food soooo much more!
8. I hate exercising! But always feel good when I do.... I suppose thats not too surprising....
9. I have moved every year since my divorce in 2002.... I have enjoyed it...But Im tired of it now...i'd like to settle down.
10. If I could I would eat Pei Weis at least 2 times a week...love that place!
11. I always wanted to be a movie star...not for the work but for the MONEY!
12. My first kiss was at Arlington Park Elementary last day of the 5th grade, behind the school... a quick peck and ran away...hehe
13. I have two homes...one in Ohio with my bros and sis in laws and the one that pulls me here being near my kids in Utah. I've always felt split between the two.
14. I want to travel again before I die...Ireland and Australia and England and Italy....
15. If I could I would have had more children...they light my world! Love you A and R and S too!